Hockey headlines in August?

What's it take to land the NHL in the headlines at the end of August? Nope, it's not Sid the Kid going Tommy Hilfiger on us. It's the collective cojones of the Dallas Stars organization, who have been so bold to take shots at each US sports league that is more popular than the NHL (AKA nearly all of them).

Hell, any press is good press, right?

It is quite ballsy of the Stars to put this out, but I guess you've got to do what you've got to do when you are in a town where you play third fiddle to the Cowboys and Mavs (Maybe fourth fiddle? Do people in Dallas care about the Rangers? I certainly don't know).

Anywho, retaliation from other leagues certainly won't happen, but it wouldn't be difficult, that much is for sure. I mean there are tons of great angles that others could choose from. In fact, here are a few that I would produce if I was a marketing director for other leagues:

"The NBA. Where we don't cancel entire seasons."

"Welcome to the NFL, where our TV ratings are actually higher than Travis Henry's college GPA"

"Major League Baseball. Our players don't break each other's spine and two hand players over the head"

"Hey NHL. We've got Posh Spice. What do you have? Signed, the MLS"

I could go on and on, but then that would just be a crappy excuse for me to lengthen this post. Feel free to add on your own, there's about a million crappy things about the NHL to choose from.

One thing I did want to work in was a Rick Tocchet shot, but I quickly realized that neither the NBA or MLB would work for this. So I would like to extend a thank-you to Mr. Donaghy, Mr. Tocchet, and Mr. Rose for forever tainting their respective sports. Sports fans everywhere truly appreciate it.

Update: ESPN made better ones. Please notice that mine was posted first. (2:16 vs. 5:54)

People of Canada, I Bring You Football Jesus

by Ryan


The CFL is almost football. It's sort of like a generic slinky; at first it looks like the real deal, but after a few minutes it starts to get a bit weird looking. By hour's end, both are unwatchable.

Surely Canadians have a good reason to pay attention to the NFL. However, there is no excuse for this.

That's right people, Jesse Palmer is officially an NFL expert. Now I know that he has done some work with Fox in the past, but is he really qualified for his own segment?

Let's look at the statistics. In his six year NFL career Jesse played in seven games. His stellar 52.5 completion percentage and three touchdowns is all I need to see that Jesse is a bonafide football god. I can't wait for him to sympathise with the Falcons and Dolphins, who he could still land on the depth chart with if enough people died.

I'm always amused with how TSN presents their news. Almost every story begins with a reminder of how Canadian the sports world is. Every Blue Jays game is life or death, any team with a Canadien player on it is cause for celebration. I'm almost positive they just link the Pheonix Suns website and call it NBA coverage. After all, Steve Nash is Canadian.

That level of sugar coating continues with their on air talent, too:

Palmer also brings his celebrity status to Canada's most-watched entertainment newsmagazine program, eTalk, where he will appear regularly interviewing A-list stars from the world of movies, TV, music, fashion and beyond. Palmer will attend major movie junkets and the hottest and most exclusive parties/events during the star-studded Super Bowl Week, providing eTalk with behind-the-scenes coverage. Based in New York, Palmer brings another layer to eTalk's already established news team.

Wow, I can't wait for him to cover High School Musical 3 and the Prevent Defense at the same time. Count me in.

This just proves that as Americans we really have nothing to complain about. Sure, health care costs a fortune, but at least we don't have to take a former reality star's word on how the Bears look this week.

His answer, I'm sure, would be "adorable".

Update: Awful Announcing reports that he will be covering college football for the Four Letter. You see what you miss when you get news from TSN?

I'm a Bit Testy Today... I Blame the Hut

by Ryan


You have no idea how many times I've wanted to get myself banned from ESPN's "Conversation Beta."

Most of the time these urges come from the works of Skip, Jemele Hill, or Scoop Jackson that bother me. Today it's Jim Caple. Now, I saw this story a few days ago but held off because, quite frankly, I didn't want to be pissed off that day.

If you don't want to read, here's a summary:

I used to be a Red Sox fan, but now that's gay. Bush joke, Bush joke, I write a crappy cartoon, buy my books about Boston, Red Sox fans are all the same, Bush joke, hey have you heard about Iraq?

And scene.

Now, I actually used to like Caple's work. When he first started at Page Two he was funny and stuck with things he knew. But ever since he got that "senior writer" tag and started looking for places to carry his wife on his back he's gotten a bit loopy and well, boring.

Other things that bother me because that fat guy who throws hard went after the Greek God of Walks... (I'm kidding, really... I'd just like to see if anyone is actually reading this...)


I know this is a bit old, but this guy isn't a big fan of research. To quote:

The Buffalo Sabres this season will switch to variable ticket pricing based on the date and opponent, similar to what the Mets do with their gold, silver and bronze designations.

Thus, the same cheapest Sabres seat that costs $20 for some games will cost $68 for others; the better seats that cost $90 for certain games will cost $203 for others. Because it's impossible to predetermine the value of games, the plan is a cosmetically beautified exercise in price gouging.

Whatever became of the NHL's on-ice "Thank You, Fans" campaign? Must've melted away.

I know it's fun to bash the NHL and everything, but at least pick the right angle. The Sabres have had variable ticket pricing since the lockout ended; and even with the wide range of prices they still have some of the cheapest tickets in the league.

If you really want to make a point, talk about how some large market teams have raised their prices dramatically, which in turn raises revenue averages and thereby moves up the cap limit. I know a lot of NHL numbers are hard to find, but it's not hard to make a few calls when you work for the Post.



David Beckham got hurt today, and the sports world will now mourn for 4-6 weeks accordingly.

Well, not really.

This whole Beckham taking over America thing is officially a joke. I know soccer is a tough sport, but Becks must have the body mass of tissue paper or something. Hey, at least he had that nice free kick. Totally worth it.

I know it may be ethnocentric to say, but if I have to pick a "star that will make an obscure sport relevant" I'd take Sidney Crosby and his pink shirts over Mr. Posh Spice any day. Sid broke his freaking foot last season and still played through the playoffs.

Okay, so maybe I won't take the pink shirts, but the Kid is tough.

No Contest

by Ryan

Chen Ming Wang has a no hitter going to the 6th.

This is relevant because this is the second straight day the Red Sox have failed to get a hit until the second half of the game.

To remedy this, I am posting the fact that he has a no hitter and hoping someone takes him deep. It worked last night, when I called someone screaming "NO HITTER NO HITTER!" The next batter, David Ortiz, went yard.

To be honest, I'm not really concerned with the Yankees anymore. This is the series they take 2 of 3 games and look poised to make a run. They are the Yankees, and they will. Will they make the wild card? I have no idea, I don't watch Mariner's baseball enough. I'd have to say probably.

Watching this on the YES Network feed is fun because words such as "handcuffed", "incredible", and "Jetergasm" are sprinkled in like wildflowers in a prairie. Personally when I think of Wang and "handcuffs" I think of this.

Robinson Cano just hit another home run. Maybe this was a bad idea.

Again, I'm not terrified by a sweep; I just don't want anything substantial to happen. For years Red Sox fans were the ones saying "yeah, but Pedro owned you last night!" as we were six games back. Now the shoe is on the other foot.

It is interesting to consider that if not for Shannon Stewart, Schill would have a no hitter under his belt this year. His struggles since that game have almost erased the memory of that magical game. Here he is, seemingly battling through the twilight of his career just a few months after he looked as good as ever.

That's the thing about "almost" and "could have"; they aren't remembered because they didn't happen. If everyone remembered the "almosts" this city would have a completely different image. Buffalo knows "what ifs" more than we ever would care to, and no one on the outside will ever care.

Dustin Pedroia just lined out. This game will keep going, but let this post be a reminder of the potential sports bring. This game may go down in history as one of the all time greats. Just one pitch, however, can make it just another game.

If you are a Red Sox fan watching this game, what do you hope for?

Sticking it to "The Man", One Auction at a Time

by Ryan

Now I've seen some things, but this this is one of the most absurd things I've ever seen.

I know I'm the guy that frequents NHL charity auctions, but you have to admit that thing is pretty sweet compared to some slobbered up football cards. Somehow it seems like a reach when you drop over seven grand on ripped up Vick cards.

Ebay is one of those places that compliments the sports scene quite well. It has become an extension of the sports collectibles industry, which makes a living on just how crazy some people are. I mean, everyone loves when David Ortiz tries to sell his car on Ebay, but people really dig deep when they can make a point about dogfighting.

I am a fan of the activity, however. Scarcity rules the industry, and every card sent to the dogs means that this bad boy goes up in value.

Of course the money goes towards a good cause, but I just don't see the impact a gimmick like this will have. Now if we could bid on the naming rights of Travis Henry's next kid, then we'll talk.

(For the record, if it's a girl: Moondance, a boy: Rufus)

Not Even the Foggiest Clue

by Ryan


The NHL is in a perpetual state of begging people to pay attention to hockey. Sometimes, however, they seem to cause their own problems.

Case in point, the Canada/Russia Super Series going on now. The eight game Under 20 tournament is happening as we speak, and you probably had no idea. That's becuase unless you frequent TSN.ca (Read: ESPN Canada) there is no possible way to be informed of this other than the NHL's own website. That also means that it is not on tv in the States.

Um... am I the only one that would rather enjoy watching some hockey? Since when does the US not being involved in it stop people from watching? US Soccer sucking recently hasn't stopped people from watching the World Cup. Everyone saw that Zidane guy headbutt that Italian... right?

From what I've read, the games have been good too. Today's game featured a local player scoring again and fog. That's right, a fog game. How old school is that?

Besides, who doesn't still despise Communism? It's a freaking American Tradition. If you put the chance to see Russia lose on television, you can pull more than a 0.1 any day.

Okay, okay. No one will watch, I know. But I want some freaking hockey, and it's not there. Do you know what Versus is showing at 8am on Friday, the slot that Game 3 would be in?

BENELLI'S AMERICAN SAFARI (TV-PG)
Birds, birds and more birds. Join host Steve McKelvain as he entertains Benelli trick-shooter Tim Bradley and Federal Premium Ammunition's Jason Nash as they chase chukar, wild quail and waterfowl at Texas' own, Sarco Creek ranch.

Riveting.

Gee I'm glad that's on instead of hockey. Who wants to watch Kyle Turris destroy the Reds when quail hunting is on? Dab gum ice boys and their sticks.

This is just one more example of why hockey is meant to be on ESPN. The Super Series would be re-aired 4 times a day on tWWL, with Melrose, Bucci, and crew hosting a two hour pregame show on ESPN News. That's how you make things happen, force it down the people's throats.

Speaking of shoving things, where is that USA Basketball qualifier?

Is it Just Me, or is Timmy Looking Jacked?

by Ryan


Everyone seems to feel that steroids are ruining pro sports. With Barry Bonds parading around like a fan appreciation day bobble head, it is hard not to be disheartened at times. What we need is a knight in shining armour to arrive in the sports world and take us past the steroids age.

Enter Tim Couch. Our favorite NFL Draft bust reminds us once again that no matter how much HGH you pump into your system, you can't get rid of natural suckitude.

If you read the story Timmy doesn't seem to think it is a big deal. He got a boo boo and took some HGH to make it better. You know what? He's right. I'm glad he finally realized that while steroids can make you better at what you do, they can't make you good at anything.

I doubt that he would try, but a story like this would effectively end any chance of Tim Couch suiting up for your favorite NFL team anytime soon. Thank God.

I'm sure Aurthur Blank and the Falcons are very disturbed by this. God only knows that Blank believes in second chances, but steroids? Heavens no. No crappy quarterback of his will have a tainted medical record. That's just sick.

A Frozen Day In August

by Ryan

Maybe not everyone is as crazy as me, but today I felt the distinct chill of a new hockey season.

Last night I finalized my mini pack order for the upcoming season. $975 worth of tickets for a season that suddenly became a lot bleaker this summer. Still, I can't wait to go back to Section 304 and watch those banners raised. It's going to be an interesting sports year in Buffalo, and Sabres hockey will still be fun to watch no matter who has left the team.

Today I also found this brilliant website, which I will be visiting from now on. Not only does this site highlight the new RBK Edge uniform changes, it pits team logos against each other in a popularity contest, as well as let fans send in their own uniform and logo prototype. The designs alone are worth a once over, and anyone curious about what teams are doing with RBK's manhandling of uniform policy should give the site a glance or two. Be sure to vote against the BuffaSlug while you are there.

As I was checking on my many fantasy endeavors on Yahoo Sports, I stumbled across the announcement I've been waiting all summer for: Fantasy Hockey is back!

This clinched it for me. Nothing of interest has happened in NHL news for some time, so any sign of the season coming closer will make me smile. Now I have drafts to plan, research to do, and training camp to over analyze. Awesome.

It's just nice to get that frozen feeling, even on an 80 degree day in Buffalo.

No Comment? No problem!

by Ryan


It may be hard to believe, but I feel last night was the start of Monday Night Football's turnaround.

There was something about the booth combination and the Michael Vick Saga that seemed to show off everything Monday Night Football should be. And while it may pain Joe Theismann to hear this, I actually enjoyed the broadcast. A lot.

Sure, there was plenty of Michael Vick overkill. Interviews were done with people that may or may not know anything about the ongoing drama. But when it came to the Falcons organization, no punches were pulled.

I think what works about the MNF crew is that not only do they come from a diverse background, they all happen to like eachother. I'm not sure if anyone else noticed this, but Theismann hated Tony Kornheiser, and Tony seemed to enjoy this. Now while that does make for some great comedy, it does not make for a smooth broadcast.

With Ron Jaworski in the booth this year, however, things seem to go much better. Jaws is one of those guys that loves the game so much he could talk about it forever. If anyone has stayed up on a Saturday and watched one of those 4 A.M. "NFL Matchup" shows, you know what I'm talking about. Watching Jaws makes you feel smarter after you're done, like you could actually understand the Tampa Two scheme. That may not be what some people want in their football broadcast, but I think Jaws does provide something that has been missing from most TV crews in the past: Football IQ.

Mike Tirico is bland, predictable, and doesn't have much to offer in regards to commentary. I think that works for him because he has someone like Tony Kornheiser to do that for him. Tony isn't afraid to tell you what he feels, and while his fantasy ramblings have been annoying, he seems to be more on point this year.

The different backgrounds and styles of the three seem to bring a pretty equal viewpoint of the action. The football broadcast itself was smooth and enjoyable. (well... as enjoyable as a preseason game goes.) Kornheiser made the usual jokes, Tirico said what he was supposed to, and Jaws analyzed everything he saw. He was spot on in reading a blitz late in the game, and his football IQ will help others understand how the game works.

The most telling moment of the broadcast came when it was disclosed that ESPN was not allowed to ask any questions to the Falcons players during their sideline interviews. Kornheiser took notice of this, calling for accountability from the Falcons organization and letting their players speak for themselves. He spoke as a journalist, not as a guy in a booth getting paid by tWWL.

Jaws then defended the Falcons, saying that they are trying to move past the issue. It was an interesting paralell to Tony, and one that shows the strengths of the booth. It just didn't feel like there was a company line drawn, but rather Monday Night Football was used to spotlight and discuss one of the most interesting and devestating stories of the NFLs history.

I'm not saying that Mike Vick and his legal troubles hasn't been talked about; it certianly has and will continue to be. But tonight, when anyone who really cared about football was watching, the issue was properly discussed and explored. There was no yelling, no points awarded, just questions asked and acountability demanded.

Everyone is sick of watching "First and 10", "Mike and Mike", or Sportscenter anchors editorialize over the situation. Every fan has their own opinion on the issue, and no amount of yelling is going to make their own view catch on. Still, it was nice to see it properly handled on the one of football's biggest stages.

This whole "Mike Vick" thing isn't going to go away. The least we can do is a fair look at it.

Live! From Bristol! It's Monday Morning!

By Jon

Just when I thought the train-wreck that is Cold Pizza, err....., "ESPN First Take" couldn't get any worse, someone has to go and call Roger Goodell a communist.

Read that again. It happened.

Doug Stewart, who apparently has a radio show called 2 Live Stews, was asked how long Goodell would suspend Vick after his prison sentence during the First and Ten segment, and responded by "accidentally" calling the commish by the name of none other than Fidel Castro. Yes, because the commish of the most powerful sport in the US is doing his best to rid his game of criminal activity, he is now being compared to a communist dictator who is a public enemy of our country. Classy Doug, real classy.

Maybe Mr. Stewart has a point. Goodell imposing an indefinite suspension on a convicted dog fighter/torture extroardinaire is just as big of a catastrophe as Castro allowing nuclear missiles to be pointed at the US at the height of the Cold War, if you think about it. They're both tragedies. The latter because our entire nation was at risk, the former because our great nation can't watch the so-called "most electrifying player in the game." I for one, will surely miss Vick not being able to find anyone other than Alge Crumpler open and putting his leadership skills (or lack therof) to good use as his team loses game after game.

Goodell is coming down hard on the players. His league has become synonymous with criminals and law-breaking, and he's trying to clean it up. Basically, this is what he is faced with: Leave the players alone and deal with the media telling him they are morally inept, or punishing his players and get called a communist by some douchebag on a god-awful show on a terrible network's second-rate station. Tough choice, really.

(Sidenote: You need to do something really awful to be called a douchebag when Skip Bayless (AKA the doucheist of the douche bags) is sitting four feet from you. This feat may never be topped. Congrats to the whole Stewart family.)

Say It Ain't So, Marv!

by Ryan


A text message from Marv Levy just gave me some heartbreaking news: first cuts were today.

I thought I had another day to relish the glory that is dead roster weight, but Marv had to pull the rug out early.

While the release says the most surprising move was cutting Morgan, I was shocked to see D.J Fitzpatrick go. First of all, who cuts a K/P combo like that? Sure, he couldn't put a kickoff or punt past the 15, but he can do both half decently. I think that makes up for it.

Besides, he had the best tackle of the game on Friday. Why not retain him for his ability to make shoestring tackles to save touchdowns? Forget keeping him for special teams, put him at corner and let him loose. The way preseason has looked we are going to need a lot of shoestring tackles to keep the score under 40 this year.

This is a serious blow to me personally. D.J was the first person I could call "Fitzy" since our write in friend Rory straddled the puck in Game 7 of the ECF against the 'Canes. I'm not about to call my punter "Mormy" anytime soon, and Rian Lindell's parents already screwed his first name up enough.

Just a depressing day in sports for us all.

Oh, and Michael Vick yaddayaddayaddaoveranalyzetress regurgitatemurderprisonrapejokeetcetera.

Glad we have that covered.

The Other Half

by Ryan


"Well, at least the first half wasn't so bad."

In most preseason games, taking that statement away from what you watched would be considered a good sign. Sure, your 3rd and 4th string squad may have made some mistakes, but the first team looked pretty good while they were in there.

Friday night was half of that story. While Losman struggled at times, there were the flashes of brilliance we have come to know. Two long outs were executed perfectly, and while 9/20 with one INT doesn't exactly dazzle, we all know what we saw in his 64 yard TD pass to Evans.

Marshawn Lynch(9 rushes for 9 yards) didn't look like the "Money" pick we want him to be, but you just can't say what we will see just yet.

The other half of the story was on the Defensive side of the ball. That side is shaping up to be a train wreck.

There is something to be said about Kerry Collins running you over. But what can you say when it's your first team defense that gets trounced?

The scary thing is that it doesn't feel like an abberation. It wasn't just about Kerry Collins' two touchdowns, or the 28 points against. Again, it was missed tackles and a microscopic pass rush that crippled any defensive stops.

Since camp began, the two major concerns have been the youth on D and J.P.'s development as a quarterback. Three games have passed and we still have those same questions. It's a very startling thing to think about.

After the Falcons game I felt as though progress had been made. The loss wasn't what was important, it didn't mean anything. Friday's loss felt much worse. Take away the aformentioned TD from Fred Jackson and we were officially blown out by the one-two punch of Vince Young and Kerry Collins. Eeep.

There are three weeks until the opener against Denver, and I still have no idea what this team can do. The one thing I do know, however, is that if they don't go out and destroy Jon Kitna and the Lions on Thursday my expectations will dip down pretty low. Jon Kitna thinks his team can win 13 games this year.

If they want me to think we can break even, they better show up.

Ice Bowl-O A-Go-Go

By Chris

Well, it's technically almost official. According to "various NHL sources," The Buffalo News is reporting that the Ice Bowl between the Buffalo Sabres and Pittsburgh Penguins will be played on January 1 outdoors at Ralph Wilson Stadium on NBC. Still no word on how tickets will be distributed or how much of my paycheck will be going towards them.


An official official statement is supposed to come down from Sabres brass on September 10 and if that doesn't get you pumped for the new hockey season, NHL 08 will be released the next day. My toes are starting to get frostbite just thinking about it. Unfortunately, it doesn't look like the game will include an unlockable outdoor rink.

The Other Fast Freddy

by Ryan

Before we get to the sobering reality of last night's game, let us pause to enjoy the fine wares NFL Europa has had to offer.






Yes, the bigger runs were before that, but that was one heck of a shoulder bump there. Fred Jackson knows how to celebrate meaningless touchdowns, my friends.

More on last night's train wreck to follow...

Aflie All Over Your Chest

by Ryan


If you haven't noticed, I'm a big fan of uniforms, especially with the entire NHL overhauling how they roll. So of course I was interested in this press release about the new Senators logo.

After a quick onceover, however, I wasn't as focused on those massive color splotches under the arms as I should be. (Seriously, why is everyone going for that confetti explosion look when they score?)

I mean is it just me, or is the new Senators logo modled after Daniel Alfredsson? Look closely at the giant photo of him top right. You're telling me that crest isn't Alfie with a broom on his head? Sure, nose shape is questionable, but how many people do you know that stare so intently at nothing?

Of course, that picture could have been taken after the new logo is finalized. ("Hey Alfie, look Roman/metrosexual for me in this one..." *CLICK*)

Still, I'm not here to argue for the chicken or the egg. All I'm saying is that there is a strong resemblance betweej that logo and someone on the team, and it certianly isn't Oleg Saprykin.

Actually, this "create a logo in your captain's likeness" thing isn't a bad idea. After all, he is the face of your team. (For better or worse.)

Still, it may not work for everyone. Somehow I don't think this will work. What about this? Wait, wait... I think we have a winner.

Come To Pappin!

by Ryan

Leafs fans rejoiced all over Canada today, as conclusive evidence of an impending Stantley Cup Champoinship was discovered... in Florida.

Now I know what you are thinking (whaaaaaa?), but let me blow your mind here.

Jim Pappin was on the last Maple Leafs team to win the Stanley Cup. 1967. After he got traded, he gave away his ring and disowned the team. The ring soon was lost. Until today.

This is it, the missing link. Pappin's ring is just like The Babe's Piano, and now that the ring will be returned to it's rightful owner, the Leafs are bound to take care of bussiness!

Oh man... this is just like that Tragically Hip song! That ring is Bill Barilko, and now that it's found the Leafs can be good again! Someone call Gordon Downie up, he's got another song coming. He can call it "Underwater Metal Detector Treasure"... or something. Let him work it out, he's the talent.

So while we all order those "Stanley 08" Leafs jerseys, let us gaze upon the face of a champion.

Seattle is a OK.

by Ryan


Sometimes it is very clear just how blind justice is.

The NBA is a league that suspends players based on a slide rule, forces them to shop at Brooks Brothers, and stays mum on tampering from within its very core. In an era in which it seems every major sports league has its problems, it is safe to argue that the NBA suddenly has the worst of it.

So in this dire time of turmoil, David Stern must to be summoned to crack down on unruly behavior in his league from now on. To start, he punishes for being honest.

It is no secret that the new ownership group of the Seattle Sonics is mostly from the Oklahoma City area. It is also no secret that Seattle is struggling to get a new arena deal. Anyone with any sense of timing has to wonder why a bunch of guys from Oklahoma City are suddenly buying a basketball team from Washington. So why is there punishment for being honest?

Now I know there is protocol for these sort of things, which means lying, lying, and lying. But frankly, I appreciate the honesty Aubrey McClendon brought forth. Here is what he said:

"We started to look around, and at that time the Sonics were going through some ownership challenges in Seattle. So Clay, very artfully and skillfully, put himself in the middle of those discussions and to the great amazement and surprise to everyone in Seattle, some rednecks from Oklahoma, which we've been called, made off with the team."

If you are reading this from a rainy Starbucks cafe you are probably nodding to yourself. The man isn't lying; an ownership group swooped in because Seattle can't seem to get an arena deal done. The new owners have ties to an area that has shown a big interest in housing a team. Is there any guess to a possible relocation site if a new building in Seattle falls through? Yeah, I was thinking Moosejaw, Saskatchewan as well.

What bothers me about Stern punishing McClendon and his ownership group is that it is only a measure to save face. He should know as well as anyone what that group's intentions are with the Sonics. Yet when those intentions are revealed to the public you lose your cool? Why not stop the sale instead of fining new owners for having candor about their plans? And why must the ownership group try to distance themselves from McClendon's statements?

It is an interesting parallel to his former protegee Gary Bettman, who has been much more aggressive in ownership struggles. The NHL has taken a much firmer stance on keeping teams in their current markets since the most recent league expansion.

Ensuring owners have local interests in Pittsburg, Buffalo, Ottawa, and most recently in Nashville is a much different approach to letting ownership groups come in with intentions unlike Stern's (or Bettman's). And while some potential owners have been scared away more than once, Bettman has stood strongly behind his vision for the league and the current markets his teams play in.

Whatever effect that will have on the state of the NHL is yet to be determined. However, it is a unique occurance when Bettman out performs his former mentor in any aspect. Stern's decision to fine an owner with conflicting goals seems petty at best, no matter what image it depicts to Sonics fans. Seattle knows what is in store for its basketball team if an arena falls through, just as Sabres fans knew the score when John Rigas was carted off to prison. The same can be said for Penguins fans when Mario was getting tired of running the show.

Hopefully for Seattle's sake the Sonics' fate will be the same as Buffalo and Pittsburgh. If not, one must wonder if David Stern could have done more to prevent a move.

Money is money, but home will always be home.

Welcome Back

by Ryan


This is where the summer ends
In a flash of pure destruction, no one wins
going nuclear, nuclear.
-Ryan Adams


In hindsight, deleting this blog may be the best thing to happen to it.

The good news is that everything is back to normal, comments and all. There is a lesson in this: if you want something bad enough, spam the crap out of Blogger Support until they give in. (In a related story, the rest of the Roost is entitled to punch me in the face at a time to be determined later...)

Sure, the past two days have been exhausting, and I hate myself for being stupid enough to kill it. But I did just get to use a Ryan Adams quote, and being forced to read 120+ posts has helped me gain a bit of perspective on things.

This blog really is in its infancy, but we’ve had to cover a lot of important events so far. Chris Drury and Daniel Briere are gone, and we may have just witnessed the apex of hockey’s popularity in Buffalo.

But what does this mean? Here we are, just fans of the game, writing about what we know and love. But there are so many "hockey fans" around here these days that it’s hard to get a good grasp of what people think. Blogs are popping up all over, analyzing things with absolutes and rash statements about anything involving the ice.

So what does this mean? Nothing. These things shall pass, and sooner or later the genuine article will stay around.

I would like to think that we are the genuine article. I know that this hockey thing isn’t going to fade from my life anytime soon. In fact, I’ve been salivating for a sheet of ice since summer began. This is a part of me, as much as my lack of a jump shot and good dodgeball skills are.

One of the things I’ve noticed about my posts is that many of them involve hope. Personally I feel that hope is a necessity when dealing with the Buffalo sports scene. If you haven’t noticed, we haven’t won anything substantial in decades. This sort of puts you in a pessimistic state when you think about it.

Still, I believe there is something good in sports. No matter how bad your team may be, there can be joy taken from it.

The upcoming Bills season is a perfect example of this. To he quite honest, I’m terrified of this Bills team. It has the potential to be exciting, but excruciatingly mistake-filled. This defense could kill any chance for a winning team at the exact same time J.P. Losman could make "the leap" and play like he should.

Is this unfair? Well, no, it’s football. And if there is anything we have learned from sports it is that it emulates life perfectly in regards to fairness.

Even so, there are going to be moments of joy. I still remember those two 83 yard bombs Evans caught in Reliant Stadium last year. Out of everything, even the loss on Christmas Eve, that is the most vivid memory I have of the season.

So here’s to J.P making the leap, Money making us smile, and some good memories that make it all worth it.

Oh, and always read the warnings when you are pressing buttons. Don’t be an RJ.

Fantasy Football will be the death of me.....

By Jon

Tomorrow is the day that I look forward to more than nearly any other day of the calendar year. That's right ladies and gentlemen, tomorrow is the fifth annual Fig Nuts Fantasy Football Draft.

It's true, folks. I look forward to my Fantasy Football draft more than my birthday, Thanksgiving, and Chrismahanukwanzaakuh, combined. Most will argue that this is a testament to the sad life of which I call my own, and to be perfectly honest, I would be inclined to agree.

A bit of background on Fig Nuts Fantasy football. Started before the 2003 season, a few of my close friends and I started a league based out our hometown of Lockport. Our first season resulted in us scrambling for teams to participate on draft night, and we had a somewhat successful inaugural season with an eight-team league despite none of us knowing what the hell we were doing. The next year we expanded to ten teams, with us switching over to a keeper-league format last year. We had one opening this year, and had four or five candidates to fill that spot (None other than the Roost's own Ryan took that spot). We've come a long ways, and now owners show up to draft night with briefcases, laptops, and dozens of magazines.

I can't really tell you why I enjoy it so much. Truth be told, my Fantasy strength most certainly does not rest in my drafting abilities. Ask any of my league-mates how my quarterbacking trio of Ben Roethlisberger, Kurt Warner, and Daunte Culpepper worked out last year. Note to self: Drafting players while thinking, "Hell, one of them has to pan out," is a god-awful strategy.

Furthermore, predictability will reign supreme. I can put a Goose's Roost guarantee that this is what will go down tomorrow night....

1) I will wait too long on a quarterback. Each year I convince myself that quarterbacks are a dime a dozen, and that I will be alright with a David Carr-esque QB leading my team.

2) I won't be prepared. Every single freakin year I promise myself that I will read up, make lists, and go in with a strategy. Guess how much preparation I have done. Zip. Zero. Zilch.

3) I will put too much thought into who will be available at my next pick. I can't tell you how many times I have waited one round too long for a player I want, only to have him snatched up three picks before me.

4) I will put far too little stock in tight ends, kickers, and defenses. Another note to self: A eighth-string wideout is not more important than a first string tight end.

5) I will be heavily distracted at some point. My ADD will kick in, and I will be forced to rush several picks as a result of not paying attention.

6) The team I criticize most will end up being the best team. Regardless of who it is, whomever picks the team that I deem the worst will win the league. Another reason why I suck at this game....

7) I will come out of the draft thinking I have the best team. I won't. Guaranteed.

Despite all of this, I am going to walk into the draft room being the cockiest piece of crap that I can be. I feel like this is my year. I felt like last year was my year, and the year before, and so on and so forth. That's what's great about Fantasy Football, every year is your year.

Now if only we could say that about our hometown team...

Wha ha happened was...

by Ryan

There isn't a braile version of the Goose's Roost.

Now while this is a great injustice and should be taken care of someday, it only proves that if you can see what you are reading. (If you are being read to, man up and use your eyes, sissy.)

That means you can also see the shiny new header we are using. I know it's nothing revolutionary, but it is phase one of redesigning the Goose's Roost in preparation for the upcoming fall. Stay tuned for more pretty things, most of them spawning from MS Paint.

The bad news about that vision thing is that if you look closely you will notice our archives are a bit light at the moment. That's because I accidentally deleted the entire site a few hours ago.

The explanation for this occurance is more complex and utterly stupid than you can imagine; but trust me when I say that the other Roost members will never let me live it down. (Hey, even the best of us have made that mistake...)

Because of this, I am now in charge of reposting every article on this site. So far I have located all of June and a few recent posts. Please bear with me as I scour the series of tubes we call the Internet for my own writing. In the meantime we will operate as usual, and I encourage you to keep coming back for frequent updates.

However, if for some reason you want to find our first post, well, let me know when you find it...

Big Poppa

By Chris

Just to update a previous post, Buffalo Sabres winger Thomas Vanek is now a proud father.

Thanks to the translation generator at dictionary.com for this pretty accurate account from Vanek's website:

16. August 2007

Thomas is proud dad!

With one day delay to the calculated birth date came Vanek junior to the world. Friend Ashley brought a healthy boy to the world.

At 9.35 o'clock local time was it so far: The first common baby of Thomas and Freundin Ashley saw the light of the world in Minneapolis/pc. Paul.

The most important data: The son of our ice hockey Cracks weighs 3.7 Kilos with 53 cm size.

First statement: " The baby is beautiful and very good. Mother and child go it well, everything are ok.

The name is not certain, however in the next days here is announced. Also it will give then here to see the first baby photos.

The team of thomasvanek.at wishes much luck to the young family and all property!

And, Thomas, even though I'm not entirely sure what "son of our ice hockey Cracks" means, the next celebratory cigar is complements of the Roost.

An HD View of Imaginary Football

by Ryan


Preseason games just don't have excitement attached to them. A fan's feelings during preseason football can be broken down into a few simple categories:

1. Oh no that guy's on my fantasy team please get up.
2. We suck because we are hiding the good plays.
3. That 4th stringer isn't that bad.
4. Thank God I didn't pay to watch this.
   

Well, I did pay to go see the Bills' first preseason game. But thanks to the fine folks at Stubhub, I paid a mere $4 for this beautiful view. Suffice to say, the parking cost more than my entire night, food included.

The first thing I noticed when I got to my seat was the new Jumbotron, which is as good as advertised. My camera phone couldn't get a very good picture of it, but let me assure you that the picture quality is as crisp as I've ever seen. My only complaint is that they somehow didn't have room for the timeouts on the main screen. The fact that you could probably watch the game from Batavia on it does seem to make up for that, however.

Just after the kickoff the injury cart went flying by with Ryan Denney on it. Turns out he has a broken foot, which is probably the worst text message the Bills have sent me all season. Anthony Hargrove had a very good game tonight, but with his suspension looming the Bills have suddenly become very weak at Defensive End.

I was let down by the lack of Vick-related paraphernalia at tonight's game. Really thought the ad wizards would have stepped it up for us. Don't you think the PA should have played "Who Let the Dogs Out?" when the Falcons took the field? Shouldn't that be mandatory for all their road games this year?

The good news is that the Joey Harrington Experience is everything it has been advertised. Other than gift wrapping an interception for Terrence McGee he was mostly designated to hand the ball off to "everyone but Jerious Norwood". A young man by the name of Snelling did some damage against the Bills run D, but Coy Wire also blew him up on a shuffle pass from a panicked Harrington.

Poz was a key stopper in a Goalline stand on Hotlanta's first possession, and made a few key tackles in the face of blockers. He continues to look good as a rookie, impressing me enough to consider a jersey purchase.

Marshawn Lynch was much more active in tonight's game, and looked comfortable starting. He was also the coolest post game interview, reminding me again of why I am going to love him in the backfield. Unlike other rookies, he doesn't seem to be prepped on what to say to the press, and was both candid and entertaining with his comments. I personally can't wait to watch him when it counts.

Also looking much more poised was J.P. Losman, who continues to look less frantic in the pocket. His new snapper Duke Preston didn't help him much, and his balls were a bit off at times, but I will take baby steps from J.P., especially in a preseason game.

Trent Edwards looked very good again tonight. Playing the entire second half, he made the throw of the night to Roscoe Parrish for a touchdown. Rolling to his left, he stopped in the face of a defender, set his feet, and threw a perfect sideline pass to Parrish five yards deep in the end zone. I don't smell a QB controversy brewing, but suddenly that draft pick doesn't seem so pointless anymore.

With preseason football it is hard to know what to make of the results, both positive and negative. Anything can be scrutinized and overblown because of the simple fact that the results are meaningless. When the final score doesn't matter, anyone can make one good catch mean a jump up the depth chart; just as one blown coverage is worthy of walking papers.

What does matter was that it felt good to be back in Orchard Park. For the first time in months football was relevant in Buffalo, and while the score didn't matter, it felt good to be a part of it.

Even A Norris Trophy Can't Make That Look Good

by Ryan

Just when we thought this whole jersey redesign was going pretty okay, we get stopped dead in our tracks. I mean sure, there have been some mistakes along the way, but the Panthers unis have sucked since the onset. Still, there have been some positive strides made in the aesthetic appeal of hockey, even in Columbus.

Then the Red Wings had to come and gay it all up.

I'm not even sure what to say about that travesty. Let's face it, folks, it looks like a freaking nightgown from that angle. I'm sure the 80+ crowd in Detroit is going bonkers over the redesign as we speak.

Seriously though, the half moons or whatever the Free Press wants to call them look like garbage. I'm sure some brilliant mind at RBK thought it proper to design a hockey jersey around some frat boy's party getup, but I declare shenanigans on the polo-form. I guess when you consider how many Russians they have on the team, half of those frat tails will be tucked in, but isn't knowing what's there half the terror?

Besides, you can't hide the "C" and "A" going on the right. That's just gay. And here I thought the Sabres had the market cornered on the right chest, but that freaking winged wheel had to get in the way. Now I know it's been done before somewhere in that 82 year history, but it's still going to look backwards, well, forever.

If there was one uniform design that everyone respected and wanted to go unscathed during this disaster of an off season, it was the Red Wings. But could they stay true to the path? No. They tinkered, and it looks like crap.

Say what you will. Tell me I'm going to get used to it. Call me a whiner. Say that the new fabrics can wash my car and change my oil. Whatever. I'm still going to be averting my eyes when the Pinstripe Panthers play Pi Kappa Beta at the Joe. But hey, as long as they stay dry...

An Existential At Bat

by Ryan


I've been thinking a lot about baseball recently.

I guess it's only fair, seeing as it's the only thing going on. If you are new to the site, we have some pretty conflicting rooting interests here in the Roost. Jon is a New York Yankees fan, while I am a firm believer in the way of the Red Sox. And while I won't wuss out and run for president of Red Sox Nation, I am seriously considering getting one of these beauties.

That being understood, you would think I have something interesting to say about the AL East and the gradual slipping the Sox have been doing over the past month. Yet somehow, I really don't know what there is to say. All year I have believed that it will happen; that the Sox will start to lose a few here and there, and the Yankees will get it together at the All Star Break and make a push.

I'm no psychic, they are simply too good a team not to. There is too much money on the payroll for it to happen otherwise. So while the numbers dwindle, and Michael Kay's erection grows, all I can say is I told you so.

It's a strange thing, living here as a Sox fan. YES Network is on basic cable. Do you know what that's like? It's a Holy Day if I can get a Sox broadcast at all, but Satan and Co. has a constant feed going on channel 71. Every day I have to watch "the other guys" while Papi and friends play on a three digit channel I don't have. (The theory is if I save to buy a better TV, I will upgrade to digital HD. It's a preliminary theory at the moment...)

Still, as I sit praying someone beats the Yankees, I can't help but be calm about it. Yes, things have changed since this whole "rivalry" entered my life. It is overstated, yes. It is repeated relentlessly, in fact. But there is a complete truth to it, and something that will never be proven otherwise.

Dave Roberts happened.

Sure, he's on the west coast now, but he took that base, the Sox took that series; and whether anyone else knows it, my life has never been the same.

Every sporting event I've seen from that point on has been viewed with a different pair of eyes. Dave Roberts made the cliche Aiddas made famous come true: Impossible is nothing. It may not always happen, but when it does you will never forget where you were when you saw it.

Let's face it, being a sports fan sucks. You have no control over any aspect of the game. You can't make roster decisions, call plays, or even suggest what logo to wear. (And even when you do, some fruitcake is going to pick Steely McBeam...) It's expensive, time consuming, and emotionally draining.

Yet all it takes is that one moment to make it all worthwhile. Sometimes it takes 90 feet. Sometimes 90 yards. Others 90 seconds. But when it happens, and when you finally get to celebrate what we've dreamed about since childhood; there is no comparison.

Someday it will happen here, you know. It's bound to eventually. In the meantime, I will celebrate Wake two hitting the D-Rays, praying Dice K pulls it together, and Youk and the boys keep hitting. It's a long way to October, but all you have to be is in the hunt to make it fun.

I trust we'll be there.

Maddenoliday

By, Jon

Before I begin writing, I must warn our loyal readers that the statement I am going to attempt to prove may come as a shock to some, and may appall others. I didn't run this idea by my fellow writers, but frankly, I don't care. I guess this is a bit of a disclaimer: The following statement represents the feelings of the author and the author only, and may not be shared with fellow Roosters.

That being said..............

Any person who waits outside of a store at midnight to pick up the newest edition of Madden needs to find a hobby. Seriously.

Did you look around you? I'm sure you felt great about your position in life while you where standing there in your Chad Johnson jersey (Ocho Cinco sure can catch a bomb on Madden) at a video game store that is usually overrun with 12-year-olds sporting thick-rimmed glasses being escorted by ma or pa.

Stores everywhere are sold out by now, without a doubt. Copies will probably pop up on E-bay for well over face value. All to buy basically the same game as last year, just with updated team and player rankings. Wow! What a steal! In fact, I would go as far as saying the game hasn't changed since 2003. Sure there may be new mini-games or whatever other scams they put in there to keep people buying the new versions, and with the new systems being internet capable, you could probably get some sort of patch to update the players and rankings anyways (I am in no way a video game nut, so that could be totally false.) Anyone who wishes to argue with me that this is worth 60 bones and an all-nighter every year will lose. Guaranteed. I will fight that battle to the grave. Try me.

Also, Madden strategy does not equal NFL strategy. The next time someone tries to talk football with me and references a play or anything from Madden, I might drop-kick them. I can't even tell you how many times this has happened to me. You can know everything there is to know about Madden and not know a damn thing about real football.

I'm not saying that every Madden player is like this. I, myself, am I proud owner of Madden 2005 and 2007 (purchased 15 dollars each in 2005 and 2007, respectively). A good amount of my friends play religiously, and can put me to shame with football knowledge (especially fantasy football.) But after witnessing the beginnings of a Madden tournament on a simple trip to my local video store, I'm convinced that the majority of Madden players are simply video game nerds.

But then again, I spend my free time writing for a pointless blog read by a dozen or so people. Who's worse off? You be the judge....

Halloweenhead

by Ryan


People say there is nothing to write about these days. To them I say "bah!" and "bah!" again.

Consider the following: we are on the cusp of a football season that will be at the very least ridiculously entertaining. Considering the youth in our defensive core we may be leaping off the Peace Bridge by week three, but at least we have a starting running back with Grills. These things do matter.

To match that we have a brand new Sabres season around the bend; a season that may be a bit less magnified now that we are currently captainless. For those of you keeping score at home, however, we did not suddenly transform into the worst team in the league. Anyone feeling an 0-82 season coming on may leave now. Same goes for your clowns who bought discounted Flyers gear off NHL.com this summer. You can cuddle with Marty on your own time.


The point is this: we have a good chance at having two entertaining teams playing alongside each other this fall, and that makes me all warm and fuzzy. In fact, October is the beginning of the "sweet spot" of the Buffalo sports season. Both Buffalo teams play from then until at least January; with Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Years in between. I'm giddy just thinking about the snow.


To illustrate how sweet this fall will be, I'm posting some killer Halloween decorations I saw today. Yes, I know it's early, but this is the blog that went to Sabres rookie camp to see our boy Drew Schiestel in action. We're early risers on this kind of thing.

This is by far the coolest funhouse I've ever seen. There are three points of entry, bats hanging inside, and a skeleton knight and the grim reaper are guarding the door. Although the $300 price tag is a bit much today, you have to consider the UFA market and what it will cost for one of these in two years. You know what, Mr. Lowe, give Sam's Club $500 for it and call it Dustin Penner. The kids will love it.

This one is a bit cheaper, but in all honesty, price doesn't matter with this. If you can't tell, that's a hearse driven by the Grim Reaper. Not only do the lanterns actually work, but the horses' eyes gleam as well. I know Christmas has sort of cornered the market with these inflatable lawn ornaments, but judging from that terrified child running away on the right, I think that is no longer the case. That hearse is going to show up on some rich kid's front lawn, and he'll be so preoccupied with all the other cool stuff he has he won't even notice. Meanwhile, you are stuck with those freaking plastic pumpkins and a hanging cardboard skeleton.

God I hate the Rangers.

Best Saturday All Summer

by Ryan



Just when you think it will never happen, hockey pops up to say hi again. I awoke this morning to find a nice, thick letter from the Buffalo Sabres in the mail, and I am happy to say it was my mini pack forms.

For the record, there are five value, five bronze, 22 sliver, and eight gold games. If you don't feel like doing the math, that's only 40 games. So which game is missing?


Hrm... feels like there should be a Penguins game on New Year's Day in between there. I wonder why we can't order tickets to that? Maybe we will have to go elsewhere to watch that one. Maybe.

Leaving that game off the schedule is suspicious to say the least, but I would be a whole lot happier if something was announced officially. Yeah, that way Bucky and friends could get their tribal gowns out and dance for warm weather. What a guy.

Oh My God, Whatever, Etc.

by Ryan

When you watch as much TV as I do, you eventually recognize a few trends within the advertising shoved down our throats as sports fans. This is a terrifying thing to realize, that you actually watch enough games to know what is coming. Then again, it only means those thirty second flashes of terror are actually working.

So while you watch the actual football that comes with the preseason, I'm watching the commercials and preparing for the worst. Here's what we've got on our hands so far this year.

Alcohol with a side of guilt trip.

For some reason, beer companies have gone from demanding you buy a six pack to ensuring you know just how hard they are trying to make you happy. Apparently showing scantily clad women holding a case of beer isn't what men want anymore; we'd rather be explained the finer details of beer making.

Our friends at Budweiser go to the "expense" of Beechwood aging for their beer. Their latest commercials say so, at least. Oh, my bad guys, I'm sorry I insisted you go the extra mile for my sake. You know what, next batch, just do whatever you want. I don't want to be a burdon.

Budweiser isn't the only one, though. Sam Adams went to the trouble of making sure all their beer is bottled in brown bottles. Every. Single. Bottle. They even made sure to explain to us via motion arrows just how that light moves in and destroys beer. Wow, I'm speechless. Clearly everything that is holy is at risk here. I'm getting amber tint on my windows tomorrow, just to be safe.

But don't forget Coors Light, for God's sake. They brew in the mountains. No, really, and it's freaking cold up there. Like, cold as balls. It's so cold, freaking bullet trains turn beaches into glaciers. And they do it all for us.

I'm not sure when the exact moment beer companies went all Sally Struthers on us, but it's a bit unnerving to see it. I'm not one to get all weepy when a company says they care about me, let alone when a hops pusher claims to care what I personally feel.

I'm not very experienced in these fields, but from what I gather taligate parties are nothing like a wine tasting event. In fact, I'm almost positive that taste is the last thing dwelled upon when football and alcohol are mixed.

Then again, what do I know? I'm just a guy watching commercials. I'm sure those horses were firmly against their beer smelling of rich mahogany.

Yeah, let's manlaw that.

(Kill me)

1-0*

By Chris

So one pointless game down, three to go. That's pretty much what it boils down to, really. Sure a win is a win and we saw some things from the lower-tier guys who might play a few downs in the regular season, but for the most part, it was just a warm-up game for the Buffalo Bills.

In the preseason, stats really don't tell the story, but they do say a lot about the coach's gameplan and which players they wanted involved in the play. And it's hard to argue against that gameplan when it results in a 13-10 win against the New Orleans Saints, even if it is just an exhibition match.

For starters, the Bills passing game was so-so. Craig Nall led the team with 54 yards, with many of them going towards Roscoe Parrish's 43 receiving total. J.P. Losman went 4/6 for 20 yards but the real story with him is how he continues to refuse to slide at the end of a scramble. When recalling his 12-yard run in the first quarter, he said he never even thought about sliding to end the play. That kind of talk allows for doubt about where his head really is in the game.

Marshawn "Money" Lynch only carried the ball twice, gaining a mighty three yards. He may have only been in one series...I'll have to go back during the film session tomorrow just to make sure. What we did get was a whole lotta Fred Jackson. You know his name now. The NFL Europa stand-out busted out for a 17-yard touchdown run in the third quarter. He probably should've been flagged for excessive celebration when he decided to hit the Square Button and dive into the end zone. Really unnecessary, but I guess it'll get him on SportsCenter. Whatever, he's got a new fan in me.

Regardless, Jackson made his case for a roster spot and should see more playing time in the coming weeks. He'd most likely be battling it out with Shaud Williams, who gained 14 yards on five carries. Shaud also had two kickoff returns, averaging 22.5 yards. They'll only be duking it out, however, if the Bills even carry four running backs, since Anthony Thomas, Lynch and fourth-round pick Dwayne Jarrett, who didn't look too bad in his pro debut, seem to be locks to make the squad.

The wide receivers were all over the place to be honest. Parrish made some really nice runs to get open, but it's really had to get a good reading on who will be predominantly backing up Evans when Sam "Special Teams" Aiken led the corps with four catches and no one is really sure if Peerless Price, the incumbent #2 put on a jersey tonight. What I'm most disappointed in is the fact that Jonathan "Fast Freddie" Smith decided to go with the "J." initial instead of the "F." this time around.

Rian Lindell's winning field goal was a 54-yarder. I remember back when the guy couldn't hit anything beyond 40, whether he was in a dome or not. He has quickly and silently become a pretty reliable kicker. When that officially happened, I'm still not sure but I've actually got some faith in the guy if the team needs to kick with the game on the line.


The defense can't tackle and seems hesitant to go after the quarterback. And even if they do penetrate the pocket, the can't take the quarterback out of the play. I can see this trend spiraling into the regular season which is a very bad thing. Remember, the Bills don't practice tackling in training camps, so it's all a "hands-on" learning experience when they get on the field. "Hands-on," that is, only if they can get a hold of the guy they're supposed to be taking down.

Paul Posluszny had a nice sack late in the game and led the team with 9 tackles. He still made a few misreads early on, but that'll happen with any rookie. A few bumps along the way is normal, but, for the most part, I liked what I saw from him. Whether he can step up and be a Pro Bowl talent like Shawn Merriman was in his rookie year is yet to be seen, but the kid can only get better.

Cornerback Jason Webster played like absolute garbage. He was burned multiple times by the Saints receivers (Devery Henderson in particular) and looked out of place more often than not. If that guy we saw tonight is the leading candidate to replace Nate Clements, then the team may be in bigger trouble that it thinks.

Reggie Bush+Screen Pass=Easy Yardage. He only rushed for 15 yards on two carries and only had 26 yards on three catches, but he seemed to be involved in nearly every Saints play in the first quarter. For the small amount of time he played, he looked very very good.

And I think Vince Young has better mechanics as a passer than Saints backup Tyler Palko. And that's saying a lot.

So basically, the game didn't mean anything, but it was a fun game and we saw some good plays. The blocked field goal and both Jabari Greer interceptions come to mind, just to name a few. At least they didn't embarrass themselves on national television, even if it is only preseason.

This Buffalo Bills team should be fun and exciting to watch this year, but I'm afraid the youth and inexperience of the defense will keep us out of the playoffs again. Unless they can grow up pretty fast and learn to play like veterans sooner rather than later, I'm afraid we'll have to save the playoff predictions for next year.

Who Needs Madden?

by Ryan


The doldroms of summer will get to the best of us. Yes, not even a fine Stephen Crane novel or mock fantasy drafts can get reasonable people through those early August blues. After weeks of haphazard summer sporting events, it's about time something really peaks our interest.


Finally, today is the day we have been waiting all summer for: the Bills preseason opener is upon us. Now while the boys pack up and get ready to play in New Orleans, we here at the Goose's Roost would like to celebrate football's triumphant return with a little artwork of our own. And what better way to use all that spare time we've had than making Miis?

And so, inspired by the glorious photo to your right, I give you J.P Losman and Marshawn Lynch.



Brooding a bit, I know, but what can I tell you? There is a reason I don't work at Darien Lake sketching people...

I like Marshawn much better, but Nintendo didn't have dreadlocks as a hairstyle. I'm sure if we drafted an asian running back I would have nailed it. If anyone wants to get a real good look at Marshawn, check out 289's take on "Money." I'll be sporting the throwback edition today in celebration of this season's official start.

Go Bills.

Main Street

by Ryan

I used to think that living in Buffalo wasn't all that bad. Then I heard everyone else's opinion. Unfortunately Buffalo is one of those cities that gets crap out of habit from just about anyone that pleases to opine. It also happens to have a bad track record with its sports teams. You can see where this is going.

So when I read the Bills season preview on Deadspin I was prepared for the worst. In all honesty, I was actually let down a bit.

The article itself was very solid, but the comments were the same things I've read or heard about Buffalo for years.

"Scott Norwood still kicking for them?"

"I'd imagine post-riot Buffalo would look pretty much like pre-riots Buffalo, no matter how destructive said riots were."

And so on.

The thing is, what was said wasn't offensive at all. In fact, I'm just appalled by the lack of originality. I mean, Scott Norwood jokes don't even register with us anymore. Sure, watching a replay of it still makes me want to rip my my esophagus out and jump some rope with it, but making a Norwood crack doesn't even phase me at this point. The same goes with a Brett Hull joke. At this point, whatever. I've heard it so many times, it's a moot point at best.

In all honesty, those horrific moments from our sporting past are nowhere near as painful as the current troubles we have. Why not tell me that no free agent would be caught dead in Buffalo? That reality would hurt more than a joke about a 47 year old placekicker.

All I'm asking for is a little more creativity when you make fun of us. The least you can do is ask when John Rigas is going to give us the tools to "finish the job." Ask me how that waterfront stadium is treating us, or if the Rockies like playing downtown.

I really don't have a problem with making fun of Buffalo. In fact, some of the best advice I've ever gotten was that you have to make fun of yourself before you learn to make fun of others. All I'm asking is for something new. Anything other than Norwood, Hull, and calling it a cesspool would be an exciting change of pace.

Heck, even Cleveland has Brady Quinn now, and their stadium was built on an ocean.

Leadership

by Ryan

Bill Walsh died.

I know this is old news in the blogosphere, but it is something I've been thinking about a lot lately. Now I know how great a coach Walsh was, but that has been said by people more qualified than I many times over. What really got me thinking this past week was this story.

That article brought me to a shocking revelation: Marv Levy is old. He's so old that he gave a head coach that just died in old age his first college coaching job. The numbers are there, plain and simple, and we have an 82 year old General Manager. It's not so shocking when it is stated in black and white, but realizing what that number means by comparison takes me aback. While Brett Farve is busy tinkering with iPods in order to look cool, our GM is thinking back on former understudies who have died recently.

To be honest, that scares the crap out of me. Like most of you out there, the Bills are my team, and their future is very important to me. Remembering that our owner is just as eldery as our GM, and the fact that there is no succession plan in place God Forbid something happens and, well, it's not fun in my head for a bit.

My fantasy draft was last night. That also has gotten me to thinking about things. Drafting for an imaginary team in an imaginary league has me realize that the Bills are not my team, I just root for them. I am a fan of the Bills just as much as a girlfriend or wife is a fan of your fantasy team. Sure, they may get upset when you lose, but for the most part they have no idea what is going on inside your head. We as fans have no way of knowing anything about One Bills Drive other than what we are told, just like a confused girlfriend being explained your league's scoring system.

There is an interesting contrast between a real football team and your fantasy team. In fantasy football, you are in complete control of your own squad, a team that no one but you cares about. Let's be honest, no one cares why I drafted RB strength first and settled for Vince Young as my QB because it's just my team and nothing more.

However, in the NFL we have absolutely no control over anything, and care more than we'd like to. I couldn't pay strangers to listen to my draft recap, but if I could have Marv Levy explain his thought process on draft day to me I'd take notes, record, and hire a professional cameraman to capture every second of it. Heck, I'd take his advice on how to cut my grass or make decent mac and cheese if he took the time.

I've read Marv's biography, traveled to Canton, Ohio to see him inducted into the Hall of Fame, and watched four full quarters of preseason football just to hear him ramble on the local broadcast. Yeah, it's a bit crazy, but I'm not the only one. Because it's Marv Levy.

And he's 82. Yet somehow, I trust him. I trust Darcy, too. I couldn't explain to you why, but maybe that's exactly the reason. Regardless of age, regardless of the past, you have to trust who's in charge of your team. Life is not Fantasy Football, and to be a fan you have to give up the reigns and have faith.

Well, no, not always. But in the doldrums of August, with a fresh, crisp season on the horizon, you have to delegate yourself to the backseat and trust where you will be taken.

Hopefully it's going to be a long, pleseant ride.

Stupid me.....

By Jon

By being a complete jerk and writing a somewhat satirical post, I completely forgot to mention the real news.

Thurman Thomas is being inducted to the Hall of Fame today. A great accomplishment for him, the Bills, and Western New York as a whole. While Thurman has had his run-ins with the media and Buffalo area (come on Thurman, Miami? Of all teams?), he is still one of Buffalo's favorite adopted sons from the greatest era of Buffalo football.

Congrats Thurman, hopefully Ralph, Steve, Andre and Willis will be joining you shortly.

Long time, no see....

By Jon

It's been a while since our loyal readers have read anything new in the Roost, and with that comes our sincerest apologies. Nothing is more annoying than a dry-spell from a site that updates regularly.

Fact of the matter is, nothing has really happened that we consider, shall we say, Roost-worthy. Let's examine.

ESPN's Page 2 released a list of 50 current NFL players that are future HOF'ers. Included on the list: Reggie Bush and Vince Young (1 year of experience each), and more shockingly Calvin Johnson and Adrian Peterson (Combined snaps played: 0. Zilch. Nada.) But a column on that would have been too easy.

Page 2 also released this list in conjunction with the first. They really outdid themselves here. I was shocked that they put Mike Vick on their list of "10 big names that won't make Canton." I can't even imagine how long the writers must have deliberated before coming to the conclusion that Jeremy Shockey will never be bronzed in Canton. Come on guys, common sense. No Roost commentary necessary.

Some guy (Jake Brown) that no one had ever heard of before this, fell about forty feet while competing in the X Games. He remains hospitalized with a liver and kidney complications, but is expected to make a full recovery. He did walk off under his own power, which is amazing considering the impact. While this may have been very close to making it in the Roost, none of us can give you real commentary on skateboarding, because I'm pretty sure we have never watched an extreme sporting event in our lives. The Goose's Roost does not support adrenaline junkies.

We probably could have spun a few non-stories into stories. Barry Bonds stuck on 754 (Thank God), A-Rod stuck on 499, including an 0-21 stretch immediately following his 499th HR (and he had us thinking he could hit under pressure. Bastard), and Tom Glavine stuck at 299. If I could have lost any more respect for Bonds, I have. I've watched his last four or five games, and I find it utterly despicable that the man can not play a full 9 innings. The man does not belong in the league, and he's only in it to have his name tied to the record (hopefully with an asterisk), because clearly the Giants aren't going anywhere.

Although, the games are highly entertaining just to watch Barry's family. Seeing his daughter and wife (at least i think it's his wife) in the stands makes me laugh uncontrollably every single time. They look like they are watching a five-hour long opera while sitting on a chair of spikes.

But with Barry, A-Rod, and Tom not accomplishing their milestones, there is no story, really. And we don't want to ramble and make you read a load of BS, because we value our readers.

Speaking of a load of BS, we were just incredibly lazy this past week. We aren't so high and mighty to think that something has to be "Roost-worthy", we are just lazy, lazy men enjoying our summers. Forgive us, please. More regular updates to come.